Jason (jcreed) wrote,
Jason
jcreed

Yet another Pop Quiz for 99-101 "Life, and the Things You Do in It"

Question 1. [100pts]

Your friend calls you up and reminds you about some party/fundraiser thing in support of the local Roller Derby team happening tonight at 10pm with free skating and an open bar. Do you

(a) say, consistently with the general intended theme of the weekend so far, namely buckling down to get some fucking work done, "no, thanks, I kind of wanted to get to sleep at a decent hour tonight", saving yourself the $20 ticket anyhow, which your friends will totally understand, because they know you usually don't go for this kind of event.

(b) think "hey, this would be a fine chance to repay sally and neal in some small part for all the rides they've given me over the years by agreeing to be the driver on the way back since I wouldn't be drinking anyway," go to the event, be patient through a couple of stages of waiting in line with a crowd of loud, crazy, drunken assholes, maybe have fun skating for a bit, maybe give up and hide in the corner until everyone else is tired if necessary, give everyone a ride back, etc.

(c) think "hey, this would be a fine chance to repay sally and neal in some small part for all the rides they've given me over the years by agreeing to be the driver on the way back since I wouldn't be drinking anyway," go to the event, find out after nearly an hour of standing in line that no quantity of attempts at well-intentioned self-persuasion will actually succeed in allowing you to tolerate being in the middle of a huge crowd of people peppered generously with loud, crazy, drunken assholes without going into a total introvert dork-panic. Attempt to negotiate with friends the dissolution of the whole "designated driver" deal like a complete tool, wherein you go back to the car to get your stuff and take the bus home. Encounter some of the organizers being pricks and yelling at you for yelling at them, which you are not, and also telling you that there is a no-re-entry policy, meaning that you cannot actually get the keys back to the car's owner, except that another, apparently non-prick Guy on Skates working there volunteers to follow you over to the car and then bring the keys back.

Which he does just fine, leaving you walking several blocks towards fifth to catch a bus, when you remember that you didn't lock the car after unlocking it to get your stuff. The car that has everyone else's purse and wallets and stuff in it Make panicked phone call to other friend, talk totally incoherently for a bit, arrange that in fact original friend can exchange keys in both giving and receiving directions through gate without violating utterly cock-in-ass no-re-entry policy without the need of intercessionary Guy on Skates. Run back to event site, get keys, run back to car, check that nothing is apparently stolen, lock car, run back to event site, return keys. Find your way back to fifth ave and catch a 500 home.

Your answer (mark only one): (a) (b) (c) XXX NO WRONG F- WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

Once again, backup retarded dork brain, you have let me down. We need to have a talk. I am left feeling like I am kind of a crappy friend.

On the other hand, just before that the three of us went to the artbus thingy show whatsit in Homestead, which was very cool. Much respect to fizzbang and everyone else involved!
Tags: life
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