Hah! Take that, you items and devices! I have purchased you, and I have domesticated you. Lo, it did take four browsers*, two hours, much swearing of oaths and curses, and an extremely fortuitous "view page source" window sitting around in the background that contained a password that nobody told me about. But I am victorious, with such signal strength from a distance of the entire length of the house as I once got only when huddled over the old wireless hub, like a cave-man over his cooking-fire. The internet is mine.